Fresh

Happy New Year!

I'm feeling better already. I've had a few days with little food inside my cold flat and am feeling more controlled. I won't say I'm in control because I'm not. I have a strong craving for all things sweet.

This morning I scanned the corner shops shelves for something sweet and doughy for breakfast. Thankfully I stuck to just buying my intended fruit juice and ate cereal. I forgot that this weight business is about such constant small victories.

I'm feeling positive about so many things today. I had a total spa day at home last night with all my favourite bathroom products, so I feel thoroughly scrubbed and gloriously clean.

I realized on the bus today that I have no concept of my size in relation to others. There was a larger lady on the bus opposite and I found myself rather horridly comparing my body to hers. I don't usually do that because most people are smaller than me. I wasn't critical of her, just curious how I must look to others. We were both wearing slouchy black leggings and both looked fairly tired.

The amount I have been napping last year has really worried me, so I want to ensure that I'm out and about every day to move. Weight gain has meant that things I found easy last year are beginning to constrict.  Thank god I'm in a conscious mind about my food this year.